Like the words from the famous song by Frank Sinatra, I’ve had a few regrets when I think of things in the past that I wish I had done differently.
Regret is a powerful emotion that can be triggered if we feel that we lost something special because of past decisions that we made. It’s easy to experience the would have, should have, could have thinking when we feel at a later time that we could have done something better but didn’t.
Having regrets can actually be positive if it makes you uncomfortable enough to stop, re-assess, and review what went wrong, what you regretted, and what changes need to be made. Regret can serve as a powerful catalyst for activating new directions and needed self-assessment.
Regret becomes toxic if it keeps you mired in the past and continually looping thoughts around to past events that didn’t work out. Obsessing over mistakes or second-guessing yourself can block you from seeing the real soul lessons and growth potential from these past experiences.
Honestly evaluating what contributed to past mistakes can empower you with new perspective and knowledge for change. Nothing changes if nothing changes and by releasing and healing regrets, it can reactivate new hope, help you learn from the past, and guide you to better approaches and new behaviors for success.
In my own journey of healing regrets, it led me on the search to become aware of what influenced my unclear thinking and decisions at the time. Experiencing regret compelled me to seek healthier life skills and better patterns to live more successfully.
I've discovered that the following can contribute to distorted thinking and regrets:
Being in denial can cause you to be unwilling or unable to see the truth of the situation and can bind and blind you to how unhealthy or limiting it might be. It can stop you from being aware of options and steps that can take you to more fulfilling places. Is denial a consistent pattern creating regrets for you in the past?
Giving away your power:
If you’re giving a lot of energy and time to another person, place, or thing, it can potentially block you from fully committing to your own special life and Divine purpose. You may regret focusing precious energy and effort outside of yourself when you could have directed it to your own important work.
Not letting go when something has ended:
One of my past mistakes was not letting go of a relationship when I needed to. As a result, I stayed too long, invested too much energy and effort, and missed out on opportunities that would have been a much better fit and more fulfilling. If it’s time to release a relationship or situation, letting go helps you stay open to something better and can prevent the sadness and regret that comes with lost power and wasted time.
I've also discovered these healthy behaviors can help create success and minimize regrets:
Loving yourself first:
Healthy self-love starts from within and helps you stay balanced and confident. People with healthy self-love are able to set boundaries, say no when they need to, and let go if they have to. When you truly love yourself and know deep inside that you deserve respect, you have the strength to walk away from situations that don’t honor you. This kind of self-love automatically minimizes regrets because you're able to take care of and protect yourself from the start.
Realizing that you have choices:
This may sound obvious but many times we don't see that we have other options when we're desperate, lonely, or afraid. Allowing yourself to take the time to stop, assess, and listen for intuitive guidance will help you receive the best answer at the right time. Waiting for inspired direction and only acting when it’s time results in no remorse, guilt, or regret later on.
Making necessary changes:
If you’ve consistently noticed the same unsatisfying patterns showing up in your relationships, work, and personal life, it’s time to do some soul searching and make changes for a more successful way of living. This can prevent wasting time, going wrong directions, or staying stuck.
Because I felt so much regret about certain choices in my life, it motivated me to start 12-step recovery work which changed my attitudes, outlook, and life skills. I also worked intensely to transform my energy and consciousness through vibrational healing work and powerful crystal skulls. As a result, I'm much more aware of choices that I have, I recognize unhealthy situations more quickly, and make deliberate inspired decisions instead of impulsive fear-based ones.
If you have regrets, realize that they can serve as markers and information for important changes to make. Much like the butterfly in its cocoon who needs to push, stretch, and grow to emerge and fly, we can use our mistakes, wrong turns, and regrets to propel us into the powerful Divine beings that we’re meant to be.
I'm an an intuitive Career Coach and Vibrational Energy Practitioner who can help you find the next right job and your most joyful life purpose:
How can I help?
I offer the following energy scans:
Career Change and Job Search Scan:
If you're struggling with your job search in this new economy or feel stuck in a position which no longer satisfies or fulfills you, I help you get noticed and stand out with proven effective job search and career change strategies and help you transform hidden fears or barriers.
Life Purpose Scan:
This is for you if you feel a longing and hunger for more. It can assist in clarifying your life purpose including enhancing and discovering your unique creativity and talents for your most joyful life purpose.
Transformation and Release Scan:
If you're unable to move forward with your life because of unresolved grief or regret over a relationship, lost opportunity, or an unfulfilled dream, this scan cleanses and clears these areas of struggle and pain.